Your Teenagers

Parents, are you feeling paralyzed by persistent worry, is your teen shutting you out? Do you ever find yourself looking back at your own teenage years looking for answers that are never there? You probably already know that you are not alone and rest assured that I am here to help you navigate such concerns and much more. These days it is difficult to understand what is going on in the adolescent brain and with much reason since they’re still under construction. Teens are exposed to so much more than we could ever have imagined even twenty years ago.
Waking up on time for school or any event or activity for that  matter is nearly impossible many for teens. Omgsh, how many times have you been late for work or an important appointment because of this? If they do get up, they walk sluggishly toward the bathroom that you were using to get yourself ready without a care in the world for your time much less theirs.

What is up with these kids though right?!!

Well, nothing that isn’t up with us parents except that our kids “seem” to know a lot more than we did at their age, but a lot more doesn't mean much if your brain is under construction, and they pretty much want us to take a detour. 
For many youngsters these days, brain development is the last thing on their mind. Puberty isn’t even a big thing for them anymore and they hit that quicker than a kid who declines a call from your phone when they’re on YouTube.

Oh, How I Miss the 80’ and 90’s!

Most parents feel like they had it tougher at that age; you know the walking all those miles to school kind of thing? “Oh, in my time, this and in my time that…” Well... I'm sorry to be the bearer of bad news but truth be told, teens are dealing with a lot more than just getting up to feed the chickens in the snow before school at the bottom crack of dawn. I wish I could say they are watching VHI or Yo MTV Raps for hours while doing absolutely nothing before they grab a bite, rush out the door with a mouthful, and without a word to meet up with friends at the beach.  

Nah… instead they’re doing quite the opposite.  Some just sit there and want to do absolutely nothing. Kids turning down family outings or vacation trips, eating out with us and shopping? Yup, they would rather sit in front of the TV for Asian anime and or video games, hogging the family computer, or that dreadful cell phone. Your son or daughter spends most of their time locked up in their room as if they’re awaiting sentencing and God forbid you enter. It feels like there is nothing you can say to your teen, I know the feeling. Chores, homework, cleaning the litter box or walking the dog is now our job even after getting off of “our jobs”! 
Your tired and you’ve almost given up, you’ve become complacent and its embarrassing and no one outside your family knows what the heck is going on with your child.

“They won’t go anywhere with me, they hate me, they scream and yell and when they don’t; they are dead silent.”
The hours once spent watching Beavis and Butthead or the Fresh Prince of Bell Air are now being extracted by a 24-hour broadcast in the palm of their hands. No implication intended. Screen time, academics, sports, and other activity pressures, also, interpersonal relationships including bullying and self-esteem issues are rampant. What’s worse, is the paralyzing anxiety teens don’t talk about, but their bodies physical responses and behaviors have plenty to say about it. 
I am not talking about anxiety related to school and friends, or, who’s gonna make the team or does she like me or not, rather, I’m talking about the unhinged news, world, national, and yes even the local news. Kids are really freaked out about this virus and there are theories as to why they’re so anxious, even entertaining theories. Even still, our kids are legit scared and think that they’re going to die or that a loved one will die from the pestilences out there. 
I don’t think I remember a time when kids were so preoccupied with their mortality. The virus isn’t the only culprit for anxiety disorders in kids these days. The violence overseas, down south of our borders, the threats to our country by dictators and here in our own backyard; The Isla Vista massacre, the gang violence (teens getting stabbed and shot in Santa Barbara) and the Goleta postal facility shootings!
In my school years, I remember earthquake drills, “stop, drop and roll,” and of course how many times did we get excited when someone would pull that fire alarm?( Drills are no longer something kids get animated about.) No, now they have  active shooter drills along with prospective lock downs which are now the norm. This is all overwhelming I know, but it is the reality of the world we live in today. We need to secure our children’s well being and teens are at highest risk to develop mental health disorders including substance abuse and dependence disorders.

Parents’ don’t hesitate, things can get better, but when and how?

Let me give you the answers you've been looking for.

For nformation On How Covid-19 has affected the Mental Health of our kids please click below.